9. Zaozyorje (Metal Gear Solid 3)

(originally posted July 20, 2023)

A collection of simple thoughts on last levels, final dungeons, and endgame zones.
Spoilers for Metal Gear Solid 3: Snake Eater.
Table of Contents

Context: Snake and EVA have destroyed the nuke-launching tank Shagohod and escaped the fortress of Groznyj Grad on motorbike, pursued by Spetsnaz soldiers. The bike crashes and EVA is grievously wounded as the two make their way to the escape plane stashed at a nearby lake.

The last bit of non-boss gameplay in MGS3 is an escort mission. Stuff like that is why it's the worst Metal Gear game.

(Note: I have maintained for years that every Metal Gear game is the worst Metal Gear game.)

As much as certain folks quip about the cutscene-to-gameplay ratio of Metal Gear (get better material, ya goons), it's probably way more interesting to examine the gameplay-to-boss ratio. That is, the amount of actual sneaking and stealthing you're doing compared to the produced boss fight set pieces. It's surprisingly small, though it broadly grows with each entry until MGSV which has like, three or four bosses over 80 hours of gameplay.

It makes it a little fiddly to figure out what does or doesn't count as "the final dungeon" in a setpiece-heavy game like this. If I were writing in a more charitable mood, the entire Groznyj Grad segment would count as the final dungeon, but that's something like 20% of the entire game. The second infiltration where the fortress is nearly bereft of guards isn't very interesting either.

Zaozyorje is sandwiched in-between the huge Shagohod motorcycle setpiece - where you are spending literally something like an hour playing a rail shooter with multiple boss phases - and the beloved final showdown with The Boss. It is, technically, the "last level" where you are playing the game "normally". Unfortunately, it just ends up being annoying and tedious, especially on a replay where you really just want to get to The Boss and hear the main theme again.

I get it in theory. It's a spot to take a break and save your game, a slower pace after the huge bike chase. EVA's injury means she moves at a snail's pace, loses stamina quickly, and is no help in a fight. This enforces the need to treat injuries, efficiently acquire food, and actually sneak through the area (or systematically headshot everyone with the tranq gun, like usual). You have to engage with all of the game's systems to make it through. Unfortunately, it comes off as more tedious than tense.

EVA's brief presence heralds several easter eggs and goofy details, most notably that you can pull up her records in the survival viewer, which updates during the stage accordingly. Her medical history includes "broken nail", "proctitis", and "breast enhancement", because Kojima can't help himself. Her food history is a bunch of fancy spy stuff like fois gras, with a noticeable bent towards Chinese cuisine for a bit of quick foreshadowing of her true allegiances; she also apparently ate a tsuchinoko once.

Details like that are why MGS3 is the best Metal Gear game.

(Note: I have maintained for years that every Metal Gear game is the best Metal Gear game.)